Monthly Archives: March 2013

A Social Ski

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There’s no denying it.  After the Birkie  the pressure is off.  No more push to get in more and more kilometers.  No more anxiety over doing a weekly long ski.  Now is the time to go out and ski for the mere pleasure of it.  That sounds bad – like it’s a grueling regimen and something we “have to do” when training for the Birkie.  Not so, really.  I enjoy the demands of that process too.  But there is a difference.

This morning dawned clear, sunny and cold.  I was very surprised to see the temperature had fallen below zero.  But at this time of year the rising sun quickly warms the air and by mid morning it was already in the mid-20s.

A friend came over and the two of us walked over to the Lester/Amity ski trails.  We donned our classic skis and headed down the tracks. This was not a speed session, it was all about sharing a love for the outdoors, the sport, a workout and friendship.  We talked as we skied, covering myriad topics as we poled and kicked.  Hesitating at intersections became a good excuse stop and talk some more.  We ran into a good friend and fellow skier, and of course spent time talking to him.  It was the epitome of a relaxed outing yet we still covered many kilometers at a decent pace.

IMG_9544The day had all the nuances of a spring day, with warm sunshine, brilliant snow, deep blue sky and warm temps.  The snow and trail conditions were far too good for spring skiing, but we had all the benefits of what felt like balmy weather.  Kids from the local grade school were out with teachers and parents practicing their skiing skills.  They couldn’t have picked a better day.  Adults populated the trail, all happy to exchange greetings and exclaim over the beautiful day.  I’d never seen so many people out mid-day.  It was the kind of day where I wanted to stay out and keep skiing forever.  In fact, I’ll admit to returning to ski again later with my skate skis.

At this stage in the winter, every day of skiing could be our last.  One good melt can turn the trails into either an icy or a muddy mess.  It made this ski even sweeter.

Yes, there are benefits to having the races behind us.  Social skiing is definitely one of them.

Documenting your health care

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Since our recent Emergency Room experience, we have indeed gotten our health care documentation in order. That episode taught us that we were vulnerable, and Rich’s subsequent surgery was all the incentive we needed to make sure we were prepared with the information and rights we needed to protect each other’s health.  In short order, we accomplished the following:

  • Exchanged information on health care providers – we documented all our doctors, dentists, clinics and their contact information and shared them with each other.  I happen to use LastPass to securely store all my passwords and other critical data, so I added records for this information as well.  I can then access it from my smartphone, iPad, or any PC.

1) assign a primary and secondary health care agent and define their rights
2) outline your wishes for life-sustaining medical treatment and end of life care

Forms for Health Care Directives are easily found on the internet, but they are specific to the state in which you live, so it is important to select the correct one.  They also need to be signed by two witnesses or a notary public.

It wasn’t clear to us what rights a spouse has, so we each filled out a Health Care Directive assigning each other as our primary health care agent.  We also asked our unmarried sons to complete one as well.  Parents do not automatically have rights to information or to make decisions on behalf of their adult children.

At our age, one doesn’t often think about end of life care (really, we’re not that old!).  But in completing the forms, we discovered personal wishes that were important to share with one another.  And since these documents can be replaced at any time, we know we can update them if our desires or circumstances change.

Rich provided copies of his Health Care Directive to his doctors and the hospital for his surgery. We are also keeping scanned copies on our smartphones as well as home computers, and sent copies to our children. You never know when or where you will need it.

One is rarely prepared for a health emergency.  We certainly weren’t.  I think we are now in a better situation going forward.  And hopefully we won’t be needing these measures soon.  But I feel better for having taken these steps.

Have you documented your health care yet?

 

Sneak Preview

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It was a year ago this week that I started my retirement.  How odd it was to get up on Monday morning with no place to go.  More accurately, no place I had to go.  It was a liberating yet oddly displacing feeling.  But I didn’t linger long, easily filling my days with long neglected projects, hobbies I’d suppressed for years, family, friends, grandkids! and of course workouts.  Cycling, running, skiing as much as I like has been a treat.  And I have enjoyed starting my “retirement job” as a freelance writer.

I’ve developed my own rhythm to my days.  With Rich still working, I have a large degree of independence.  Rich works remotely from our home in Duluth, so he is present, but occupied.  I enjoy pampering him with fresh muffins mid-morning, and he freely admits that his life is a lot simpler now that I am available to handle the myriad home duties that we used to squeeze in after work hours.

But all that is about to change.  Rich has announced his retirement as of April 26.  Before long he will join me at home daily with an unstructured lifestyle.  No doubt that will take some adjustment, accommodating his plans and needs into my new retirement schedule.

This week feels like a sneak preview of that routine.  With Rich home recovering from his surgery, he’s here all day every day.  But it’s not really a fair test.  He’s flush with small projects, just like I was in the beginning.  And more significant, his physical activity is necessarily restricted.  That’s huge.  As much as he’d like to be out skiing, he’s settling for short walks and trying to be a “good boy.”  I’m not sure how long he can last.

We are entering a new era.  After almost 30 years of marriage, the most free time we have spent together was 17 days on our one and only two-week vacation.  But we’re ready for the challenge.  Rich is already planning to do part-time consulting.  I’m hoping that can fund our “exotic travel” account.  I have my writing and hobbies.  And we look forward to more family time.  Best of all, we can indulge our love of doing long-distance outdoor sports together.  In fact, several more long cycling trips are in the planning stages.

I’ve decided I like the preview.  I’m ready for the full length feature – bring on Rich’s retirement.

Home Again

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It was only 27 1/2 hours.  But it seemed a lot longer.  From the time we walked in the front doors of the hospital to the time we walked out again, it felt as though the world had stopped.  Hospitals are like that.  Nothing seems to matter except what’s going on inside.

Even the short periods of time I spent at home were surreal.  Things just seemed, well, different.  Even the dog knew.  She is devoted to Rich, and kept looking around for him.  I wasn’t good enough for her.  She wanted Rich.  And she let me know it by whining incessantly at bedtime.  And beyond.

We were both very grateful that they decided to keep Rich in the hospital overnight.  Going home the same day as his surgery sounded like a great thing.  Sleeping in his own bed, a quiet, familiar environment and no hospital stay.  But seeing him hooked up to fluids with the nursing staff constantly checking his vitals, and professionals doling out advice or reassurance was a blessing.  The extra care and attention before we were on our own gave us an extra measure of confidence as Rich walked out the door.

It feels good to have all that behind us now.  Rich is thrilled to be showered and dressed.  He’s relaxing on the couch, not a hospital bed.  And he even sneaked a Diet Coke.

We’re glad Rich is home again.  And the dog is happy too.

 

On to Recovery

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The waiting got long. I forced myself to wait at least 15 minutes between checking Rich's status, as it continued to hover on “OR.” I invented logical reasons why he was still in there. I pushed alternatives from my mind. In the scheme of things it really was not all that long. But it seemed like it.

Then suddenly Rich's doctor came out the door and was at my feet. He delivered the words I longed to hear, “All went well.” It did take longer than normal, and there was some additional work that needed to be done, but all still within the confines of the laser surgery. No incision needed. Blockage successfully removed. Yea! On his next fleeting visit he told me he'd just talked to Rich. That was major news. Being raised in a doctor's family, Rich has a healthy apprehension about anesthesia, so coming out of that was a big step. While it was still a long time before I was permitted to see him, I could at least relax.

Now it's all about recovery. Due to the additional work done, the doctor is keeping him in the hospital overnight. At this stage, it seems a small penalty. Rich has already gone from groggy to napping to tapping away on his tablet. Feeling better can't be too far away if he is already engaging with his beloved Internet. Soon Rich will be relocated to his own hospital room. Another first for him.

It will seem strange not to have him home in bed with me tonight. It's not like we haven't spent time apart, it's just that this feels different. But once again we have a lot to be thankful for. This hospital stay is just for good measure. It's not a long, dragged out affair. And I know his recovery is already starting.

The Waiting Room

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True to its name, this is where I sit and wait. I just left Rich’s bedside so they could administer the anesthesia and wheel him into the operating room. Fortunately, he is able to benefit from the medical and technological advances that allow his enlarged prostate to be treated with lasers. So as opposed to full blown surgery, with big incisions and a long recovery process, his less invasive procedure should allow him to go home later today, and return to normal life much more rapidly.

We have been truly blessed and fortunate that in almost 30 years of marriage (not to mention our 20-something individual years before that) and raising our children to adults, we have never experienced surgery before. By the same token, we are both very healthy adults – marathoners, cyclists and long distance skiers. I’m sure the two are related. A friend of mine who is a nurse in a surgical recovery room told Rich that the doctors and nurses are going to love him for his overall good health. It’s a treat, she said, to work with people devoid of other risks and complications – unfortunately something that is all too rare these days.

Being newbies to all this, there are so many unknowns. It’s still surgery, after all. How will Rich feel later today? How long before he can resume his workouts? On the way to the hospital this morning, Rich remarked that if he was feeling nervous, how must someone feel going into a major operation? We couldn’t imagine what it must be like to face something like open heart surgery.

Technology has moved into the waiting room too. I have a restaurant-style pager that will light up when the doctor wants to talk to me. That will let me wander around in the hospital. There is also a monitor in the corner that reports the status of all the patients behind that door. Checking Rich’s patient number, I can see that he is in “OR.” More time to wait. But that’s okay – it’s where I need to be for the day, and I brought plenty to keep me occupied. And I was even able to get a good latte at the coffee bar.

I can wait.